I heard a great song today... a really great song. It's called The Unwinding Cable Car by Anberlin. It really calmed me down and got me thinking...

This Christmas is most definitely not going to be the same. I love spending time with my family. They are amazing! I just wish my girl could be here with me. Haha it's quite funny that my ex, who happens to be my best friend will be there. Nothing seems to be the same this year. My mom wont be here and that's really hard for me to take in. Just to let you know, i'm not taking the family I do have here for granted. They keep me grounded.

It's hard to feel the Christmas spirit when it feels that everything is so wrong at the moment. I'm trying very hard to keep my chin up and a smile on my face, but it's so easy to mask the hurt and pain that is inside. I don't know why I'm hurting. Maybe it's just the season... and how things have changed this year... I don't know. There are other reasons i'm sure but those are being kept with held.

On a lighter note... My hair is blue. It's amazing and smurfy... I love it!

Christmas is a time when you get homesick - even when you're home. ~Carol Nelson

So Annoyed

Have you ever had one of those days when everything is just soooooo super annoying? Well today is one of those days for me. When I got home today I just wanted to relax and help my cousin finish unpacking... That's not what was apparently lined up for me... no, instead, I was to go with her and her husband to Lowe's only to find out that I was going to get declined for a credit card, and then again to Home Depot to find out the same thing. I was only signing up for a stupid credit card so they could buy an oven for the new house that we moved into, which by the way is very nice. Anyway... Then we went to Chad's rental to look at a new couch because we don't have one for the upstairs living room only to find that the one they wanted to purchase was already purchased... Now this store isn't very big and there aren't very many couches in it, leaving the options to chose sparse... but we somehow managed to be there for 45 mins and me standing on the sidelines listening to my cousin argue with her husband because he was being soooooo ridiculously annoying and wouldn't give any input on which couch or T.V. he wanted to go in HIS house. Seriously... she wanted me to go for my opinion, and she really shouldn't have taken me. It was nonsense. And that is my day, but only part of it. Tonight is Glee night so maybe that will make things a little better? I hope so!

"The road to truth is long, and lined the entire way with annoying bastards." - Alexander Jablokov

Lazy Sunday

It's sunday... and that means lazy day! We've been sitting on the computers for 3 hours now just playing games such as Family Feud and boggle or whatever it's called. We didn't even get out of bed until like 11:30 this morning but it's okay we're young and we're allowed to be lazy right? One of my favorite movies is playing right now as I type this blog... The Rescuers. : ) It is amazing indeed.

I wish I had a drip line of constant mountain dew coursing through my veins. Do you know how amazing that would be? It would be kick ass! oh yeah! LOL like my dad said, Mountain Dew can be used for pretty much anything... It's even an antiseptic. Haha... Oh lord, my dad is something else. I love him nonetheless.

I wish finals were already over and I could relax for the holidays. I hope I don't have to work Christmas Eve... I would be really sad if I couldn't be at the Christmas Party at my parents house that night. I guess if I do work, I'd rather it be during the day.

Well, I think I'm slowly slipping into a state of sleep...

“People are not lazy. They simply have impotent goals / that is, goals that do not inspire them.” - Anthony Robbins

Holy Cow!!! It's been forever and a year! lol

Wow, I haven't been on here in forever. I should be more like my mom and blog every month. She's very good at it. In fact, I should just hire her to do it for me lol. I don't see her often though so she wouldn't have any juicy gossip that I have to post on here (not that I really have any anyway lol). I'm back home now, and realized that this is where I need to be at this point in time. I missed my family too much and when the time does come to move away I have a feeling it wont be very far away. Maybe Washington or Oregon. I have to say things are going very well and I feel very blessed to be where I am at in life right now. Yes, a few curve balls are thrown now and then, but you learn to change and grow from them. I am so lucky to have the family I have, and the grandmother that helps to take care of me! I can't forget my cousin and her husband. They mean the world to me, and quite frankly, I definitely wouldn't be where I am today if it weren't for them!

School is going great, stressful but great. I can't wait until I graduate, but who knows when that will be. I'm content with being a student for now I suppose. Hopefully my mom goes back to school and we can be study buddies! I should push her harder! : ) I'll give her a little bit of slack because she's raising 3 kids lol NO EXCUSE! It will be good for her I think. : )

I'm still having a hard time dealing with my mom mom moving away to Boise, but learning to deal with it day by day. Some days are harder then others, but I'm so good at hiding my emotions about it, that I seem to hide them from myself. I don't think it was as hard for her to leave her baby girl as it was for me to be losing my mother. Boo sad day! I guess it is nice to visit Boise when I can though.

Well I'll be off to class for now. Probably try and post some updated pictures later! Until then.

A mind troubled by doubt cannot focus on the course to victory. - Arthur Golden -